hasitsthorns: (ᴅᴏᴇs ʙʀᴜɴᴏ ᴍᴀʀs ɪs ɢᴀʏ?)
Rosalina "Has No Chill" Nurumi ([personal profile] hasitsthorns) wrote in [community profile] childrenofbahamutlogs 2025-03-04 05:50 am (UTC)

It is a surreal experience to see herself through someone else's eyes. She feels both large and so tiny simultaneously; it is a bit novel, being so tall in this perspective, but hard to really appreciate it with the scene unfolding as it is. (There is a lot to process, really, and she does get a little stuck briefly on that ring- Was she married? Or going to be? What happened?)

In a way, she can also find the comic, cosmic irony in it all: That Rosie believed Angeal to be gay. This one did too, actually, but only because he knew who the other gay men were (like Ardyn) and she only ever heard of his boyfriends. It made sense. But it also makes sense, really, that she would assume such a thing in two realities over. At least, in this one, she didn't put her foot so horrendously in her mouth about it.

Here, she can see what a friendship like Angeal's would mean to her as just that. She can see what a man wanting her - not her body, but her - could look like. And that it could be okay. It could even be better than okay, in the end. It could be something that heals and helped her in ways she couldn't fathom even from the memory alone despite the echoes of those feelings present.

As her mind switches from Amani remembrance through Angeal's eyes to the current day, she can hear him. It takes a moment to un-cross the wires of 'that's his voice, not mine' and that she's back in her own body. Man. Yeah, the world is a lot smaller like this. That kind of sucks, but- She'll swoon over a much taller man before long and remember how much she enjoys her height.

"Yeah. Yeah, I. I-" Lucidity comes with fresh waves of emotion. It's almost on instinct, really, as she starts to cry that she also reaches out to hug him tightly. "I saw me. As you? And we were talking, and-" She's trying to articulate it, but she might need to take a moment to remember how to breathe and form coherent words once more.

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